What Do You Think?

A woman thinking

A woman thinking (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

“A Woman beheaded in remote India”, “A Woman shot to death publicly in Afghanistan” – Honor killings!!

Why is ‘Honor’ seemingly smudged by women only? Why is killing in the name of ‘honor’ glorified?

It hurts to see that in this 21st century, there are still primitive pockets of thinking in the world and freedom is denied freely and dished out randomly.

Is honor limited to one gender?  Is upholding honor only one sided responsibility? What is honor, who decides what it is?

‘Honor’ is defined as – “Principled uprightness of character, personal integrity”. That definition, I can accept.  Another definition – “A woman’s chastity or reputation for chastity”.  Now I have trouble with this.  Why is chastity a woman’s responsibility alone. Can a woman’s chastity be lost single handedly?  Where is the man’s responsibility in this?

Two barbaric punishments dished out by men even though men were equal partners in the so called crime.  Why aren’t the men involved in this ‘beheaded or shot’?  Why just the women?

I am sure I am not alone when I say my blood boils at this injustice.  How can we silently witness these atrocious crimes?  Yes the perpetrators will be punished (hopefully) by the legal systems.  But the message would have gone out as an act of courage and the uneducated would openly or silently cheer. Thus the crime perpetuates.

Is there a remedy for this?  How can this level of thinking that is based on and justified by Religion, dogma, superstition, most of all – Fear, be changed?

This is also “keeping up with the Jones’s”syndrome isn’t it?  The fear of what others may think drives people to go to any length, whether it is material acquisitions at any cost or to the extreme cases as these.  Generally, we live for other people and what they think.

As these heinous crimes happen, we in the civil world shake our heads, try to understand, cannot comprehend how anyone can do things like that and go about our business, because we are so far away physically and also far removed mentally.

Are we really?

Do we not commit the same crimes mentally?  Do we not shoot the other person mentally with our harsh thinking?  Do we not behead each other with our unkind words – spoken or thought?

The potential to harm is in each one of us.  Some act it out openly and majority silently.  But the potential is there.  Cruel words, harsh thinking, brutal acts – we are all capable of them and are culprits in committing some of these acts.

What is the remedy? Is there a remedy?  What can we do?

I know I am not capable of transforming people in my immediate environment let alone men in far away places riddled with dogmatic thinking or women living in constant fear.  What I am capable of though is transforming the wrinkled corners of  my mind and heart.

I am capable of not thinking harsh thoughts about others and myself.

I am capable of speaking softly, sweetly and lovingly instead of shooting bullets of angry words.

I am capable of showering rain of compassion and understanding.

I am capable of doing the right things whether being observed or not.

I am capable of thinking, saying and doing the same thing thus avoiding clashes in my own being.

I am capable of being a conduit for Love and Peace rather than Fear and Anger.

Mostly, I am capable of being aware that I am capable.

Only I can bring these capacities into action that will transform me causing the “Butterfly effect”. Just like the theory describes, a butterfly might create tiny changes in the atmosphere that may ultimately alter the path of a tornado or delay, accelerate or prevent the occurence of a tornado in another location, a change in me will cause transformation in another and in another and so on – a sure change, one person at a time.

Now, this may take a long time before it reaches the real areas needing fast change for better, but the momentum is already in place and more and more individuals need to join in this quest for self-transformation.  We no longer can afford to think “what can I do single handed” and resign.

We can do a ‘LOT’ single handed.  We can start by changing one aspect of ours that is bothering us, that we know will benefit us and gradually add another to it. The very first one would be to ‘Stop Being Critical’ of ourselves and of others and replace it with ‘Compassion’.

Every creation happens twice – once in our thoughts and then physically.

  • Set a time limit each day initially to practice Compassion and gradually increase it so before we know, we will be compassionate all the time.
  • Become aware of thoughts randomly and incessantly running through our heads and reject them one at a time.
  • Replace with Kind and Compassionate thoughts.  This would be a slow but sure process for transformation.

You think it will work? Drop a line to let me know.

Until next time

Be Kind and Compassionate towards yourselves and others – one thought at a time………

With Love and Respect

Padma Ayyagari


About Padma Ayyagari

I am a Human Values Activist, passionate about and trying to live steeped in Spirituality. I live with the knowledge that Love is the undercurrent of all human life. I believe in Unity of Faiths, Unity in diversity and try and live my life with unity in thought, word and deed. Helping others to lead a life of practical spirituality that will give peace of mind is my passion and life purpose.
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2 Responses to What Do You Think?

  1. I’m still learning from you, while I’m trying to reach my goals. I definitely love reading all that is posted on your blog.Keep the stories coming. I enjoyed it!


  2. Pingback: Taking Charge of My Own Roadshow « Notes from a "Closet" Writer

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